April 4 – The Unexpected Oasis: How Service Fills Your Life

“The habit of giving only enhances the desire to give.” Walt Whitman

The act of serving isn't a one-way street. Those who receive help often experience a renewed sense of dignity and hope. Knowing that someone cares enough to lend a hand can be incredibly empowering. For the giver, the rewards are equally significant. Service provides a sense of purpose and fulfillment. It allows us to use our skills and knowledge to make a tangible difference in the world. The joy of seeing the positive impact of our actions fuels a desire to continue serving. But what about the benefits that come back to the giver? Why should we make space for service in our busy lives?

Service isn't just about helping others; it's about enriching our own lives in profound ways. Robert Lawrence Smith captures this beautifully when he says, "I believe that we are most ourselves when we are connecting with others through service. The impulse to serve is the mysterious ingredient that fills us up, that makes our cup run over." Serving others allows us to connect with something larger than ourselves, fostering a sense of purpose and belonging. It allows us to use our unique skills and talents to make a positive impact, leading to a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment.

Witnessing the positive change we create motivates us to keep serving, creating a virtuous cycle of growth and satisfaction.

Here are a few tips to get you started:

Start small. Don't feel pressured to commit to a massive undertaking right away. Begin with small acts of kindness in your daily life. Offer to help a neighbor, volunteer for a few hours at a local charity, or simply donate to a cause you care about. Even these seemingly insignificant acts can have a significant impact.

Talk to others. Ask friends, family, and colleagues about their service experiences. They may introduce you to new opportunities or organizations that align with your interests.

Motivation Matters:

Staying motivated is key to sustaining a life of service. When faced with a busy schedule or a lack of inspiration, remind yourself of the benefits you reap from helping others.

Think about the sense of purpose you felt after volunteering, the joy you brought to someone in need, or the way your skills were put to good use. Remembering these positive experiences will fuel your desire to continue serving.

Making Space for Service:

Life is full of commitments. But making space for service is an investment in yourself and the world around you. Think of service as a form of self-care, a way to nourish your spirit and connect with something bigger than your daily routine. As Rick Hanson reminds us in Resilient, "In terms of responsibility it's on each of us to tend to the causes that we can influence, to use the agency that we do have." Even a small amount of time dedicated to service can have a profound impact.

“Everyone has the power for greatness, not for fame, but for greatness, because greatness is determined by service.” Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

The act of serving allows us to connect with others, use our talents, and make a positive difference. It fosters a sense of purpose, belonging, and personal growth. By making space for service in our lives, we not only contribute to a better world but also discover a wellspring of joy and fulfillment within ourselves. As Rick Hanson so eloquently states,

"There is something mysteriously reparative about treating others as you wish to be treated yourself. It feels like a mending inside of what's been torn or tattered. It's also an affirmation that no matter what may have happened to you, your innermost being is intact. You can still be good to others, and you can still love." Embrace service and discover the unexpected oasis it creates in your life.

Activity: But where do we begin? When faced with a world full of needs, finding the right cause or activity can feel overwhelming. Have you ever received help from someone in a time of need? How did it make you feel?

Can you think of a time when you helped someone else? How did it make you feel?

Reflect on your passions and skills. What are you good at? What are you passionate about? Look for service opportunities that allow you to utilize your strengths and interests. This will make the experience more rewarding and ensure you're contributing meaningfully.

In today's increasingly digital world, it's easy to lose sight of what makes us human. The constant bombardment of screens and social media can distract us from cultivating essential qualities like kindness, empathy, and resilience.

My book, Nurturing Hopeful Resilience,  guides parents and caregivers through the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven age. It explores the importance of instilling strong values in children from a young age to help them develop into compassionate, responsible, and fulfilled individuals.

Through a series of practical exercises and insightful reflections, this book delves into fourteen core values: curiosity, awareness, kindness, learning, self-awareness, fairness, playfulness, compassion, service, belonging, trustworthiness, authenticity, community, and responsibility. Understanding and nurturing these values can empower our children to thrive in a complex and ever-changing world.

This book offers a roadmap for raising children who are academically successful, emotionally intelligent, socially adept, and morally grounded. It encourages readers to prioritize human connection, empathy, and compassion over material possessions and fleeting digital distractions. By embracing the power of values, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and generations to come.