July 20 – Stages of Openness in Life

Open-mindedness, a cornerstone of personal growth and societal progress, blossoms throughout our lives. Today we will explore the various stages of openness, from the fertile ground of childhood curiosity to the challenges and cultivation of openness in adulthood.

“Because…why not?” Ava, age 5

Childhood is a time of natural openness, fueled by an insatiable curiosity about the world. As Rick Rubin reminds us in The Creative Act: A Way of Being, this innate curiosity allows us to “begin from a neutral place...and welcome the winds of change to guide our way.” Children's relentless questioning (sometimes to the exasperation of adults!) and their eagerness to explore new experiences are the foundation for a lifelong love of learning.

Imaginative Play: A playground for the mind, imaginative play allows children to experiment with different identities, scenarios, and perspectives. This imaginative exploration, as Pipher suggests in Women Rowing North, fosters a “developmental perspective…allow[ing] for a new openness in our hearts and minds.”

Early Social Interactions: Positive reinforcement of curiosity by caregivers, peers, and educators plays a crucial role in shaping a child's openness. When adults encourage children to ask questions, consider alternative viewpoints, and embrace exploration, they lay the groundwork for a growth mindset.

“The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware.” Henry Miller

Adolescence presents new social pressures that can influence openness.

Identity Formation: The adolescent search for self often involves navigating social circles and peer groups. This can lead to a pressure to conform and a reluctance to challenge established norms for fear of rejection (as Michelle Obama warns in The Light We Carry, some thrive on keeping others feeling "isolated").

Cognitive Development: While adolescence brings the ability to consider abstract concepts and hypothetical situations, it can also lead to a desire for certainty and rigid thinking patterns. This can make adolescents resistant to new ideas that challenge their existing beliefs.

Groupthink: Adolescents are particularly susceptible to groupthink, where conformity to group opinions overrides individual critical thinking. This pressure to conform can stifle independent thought and limit exposure to diverse viewpoints.

“If you are open and stay tuned to what’s happening, the answers will be revealed.” Rick Rubin

Adulthood is when the conscious cultivation of openness becomes essential for personal and social well-being.

Lifelong Learning: Adults who prioritize continuous learning maintain a sense of curiosity and receptiveness to new ideas. Engaging in formal education, reading diverse perspectives, and exploring new hobbies keeps the mind open to fresh experiences.

Navigating Diversity: As adults, we encounter a wider range of perspectives in our workplaces, relationships, and communities. Openness becomes crucial for effective communication and collaboration. By valuing diverse backgrounds and experiences, we enrich our interactions and broaden our understanding of the world.

Adapting to Change: Open-minded adults are better equipped to navigate the constant flux of life. They view challenges as opportunities for growth and innovation, embracing change, as Rubin suggests, rather than fearing it as a threat to stability.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So, you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in the future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.” Steve Jobs

Understanding the stages of openness throughout life empowers us to nurture this vital quality. By recognizing potential roadblocks and implementing strategies for growth, we can cultivate a lifelong commitment to open-mindedness. This, as we will explore tomorrow, is the key to unlocking personal well-being, enriching relationships, and contributing to a more vibrant and inclusive society.

Journal Prompts –

Reflect on a time when you embraced a new perspective that challenged your existing beliefs. What made you open to change?

Imagine you could interview a historical figure about their worldview. Who would you choose and what questions would you ask?

How can you incorporate activities into your daily life that expose you to diverse viewpoints and challenge your thinking?

In today's increasingly digital world, it's easy to lose sight of what makes us human. The constant bombardment of screens and social media can distract us from cultivating essential qualities like kindness, empathy, and resilience.

My book, Nurturing Hopeful Resilience,  guides parents and caregivers through the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven age. It explores the importance of instilling strong values in children from a young age to help them develop into compassionate, responsible, and fulfilled individuals.

Through a series of practical exercises and insightful reflections, this book delves into fourteen core values: curiosity, awareness, kindness, learning, self-awareness, fairness, playfulness, compassion, service, belonging, trustworthiness, authenticity, community, and responsibility. Understanding and nurturing these values can empower our children to thrive in a complex and ever-changing world.

This book offers a roadmap for raising children who are academically successful, emotionally intelligent, socially adept, and morally grounded. It encourages readers to prioritize human connection, empathy, and compassion over material possessions and fleeting digital distractions. By embracing the power of values, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and generations to come.