May 29 – Forged in Fire - How Life Shapes Steadfastness

“If we are to make appreciable headway, persistence is indispensable. People who achieve greatness are almost invariably passionately invested in some one thing. They do a thousand things each day, but behind these stands the one thing they count supreme.” Huston Smith

Steadfastness isn't something we're born with, fully formed. It's a quality that develops, a muscle that strengthens over time through the trial of life experiences. Looking back on my own journey, the times I've truly grown in steadfastness haven't been during periods of ease, but during those moments when the ground felt shaky beneath my feet.

There was the time I poured my heart and soul into writing my end of the year student report cards, only to see my work literally disappear at the last minute, when my flash drive died. The disappointment was crushing, the temptation to give up overwhelming. But then, a different voice emerged - a voice that whispered about the value of perseverance, about the lessons learned even in failure. This wasn't just about the reports themselves; it was about building the emotional resilience to face future challenges. As Michelle Obama writes in her book The Light We Carry, discomfort and lack of reward can be teachers, pushing us to discover our inner strength.

“Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” Babe Ruth

That experience became a turning point. I started to see failures not as dead ends, but as stepping stones. I focused on learning from them, on identifying what went wrong and how I could do better next time. This shift in perspective wasn't a light switch moment; it was a gradual process, a conscious effort to build new habits. As Amy Wallen reminds us in How to Write a Novel in Twenty Pies, creating a habit takes time and repetition. I began to cultivate routines that fostered steadfastness – daily exercise, setting small achievable goals, and surrounding myself with supportive people. These practices, like bricks in a wall, became the foundation of my growing resilience. In one weekend, with the help of friends, colleagues, and a new flash drive, I was able to reproduce my report cards.

Of course, life doesn't operate on a predictable schedule. Just when you think you've got a handle on things, a new unexpected challenge can arise. Maybe it's a health scare, a job loss, or a personal betrayal. These moments are where the rubber meets the road, where the true test of steadfastness lies. As Julie Smith points out in Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?, maintaining a healthy routine is crucial during these times. That familiar structure provides a sense of stability, a reminder of your own strength and the ability to rebuild.

“You’re strong. You’re a Kelly Clarkson song. You’ve got this.” Jonathan Van Ness

But steadfastness isn't just about weathering storms on your own. It's also about facing your fears head-on, about confronting the anxieties that might hold you back. Civil rights activist James Baldwin said it best: "To defend oneself against a fear is simply to ensure that one will, one day, be conquered by it; fears must be faced." This doesn't mean being reckless or ignoring legitimate concerns. It means acknowledging your fears, understanding their root causes, and then taking action in spite of them. Overcoming that fear, as Dorcas Cheng-Tozun suggests in Social Justice for the Sensitive Soul, can be a transformative experience, rewiring your brain and leaving you feeling stronger, more grounded, and ready for whatever comes next.

“Energy and persistence conquer all things.” Benjamin Franklin

The journey of steadfastness is a lifelong one. There will be setbacks, moments of doubt, and times when the path seems unclear. But by embracing life's challenges, by learning from failures and facing our fears, we can cultivate a steadfastness that allows us to navigate the world with confidence and grace.

Activity –

Habit Stacking Challenge: Choose a new habit you want to cultivate and pair it with an existing daily routine. This will make the new habit easier to stick with and build steadfastness through consistency.

In today's increasingly digital world, it's easy to lose sight of what makes us human. The constant bombardment of screens and social media can distract us from cultivating essential qualities like kindness, empathy, and resilience.

My book, Nurturing Hopeful Resilience,  guides parents and caregivers through the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven age. It explores the importance of instilling strong values in children from a young age to help them develop into compassionate, responsible, and fulfilled individuals.

Through a series of practical exercises and insightful reflections, this book delves into fourteen core values: curiosity, awareness, kindness, learning, self-awareness, fairness, playfulness, compassion, service, belonging, trustworthiness, authenticity, community, and responsibility. Understanding and nurturing these values can empower our children to thrive in a complex and ever-changing world.

This book offers a roadmap for raising children who are academically successful, emotionally intelligent, socially adept, and morally grounded. It encourages readers to prioritize human connection, empathy, and compassion over material possessions and fleeting digital distractions. By embracing the power of values, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and generations to come.