“Gratitude is the memory of the heart.” French Proverb

“Everything is a gift. The degree to which we are awake to this truth is a measure of our aliveness.” David Steindl-Rast

In our fast-paced and demanding world, gratitude often becomes an elusive virtue. We may feel grateful in fleeting moments, but expressing thanks in meaningful and sustained ways poses a challenge. As Diana Butler Bass aptly stated, "Many may feel grateful, but they are equally aware of the difficulty in expressing thanks to family, friends, and kind strangers."
Yet, within the realm of gratitude lies a powerful antidote to the stress and restlessness that often plague our lives. Rick Hansen beautifully emphasized, "With gratitude, you feel good already." Gratitude has the unique ability to shift our focus from constantly seeking future fulfillment to embracing the present with contentment and joy.
But how do we turn gratitude into a way of healing and compassion, as Butler Bass suggests? The journey begins with an honest confession and a willingness to change. Admitting our struggle with thankfulness opens the door to learning gratitude anew, to practicing thanks in fresh ways, and to extending grace to others.
Robert Emmons related several key facts about gratitude in his book, Thanks. He explained that we acknowledge the goodness of our lives when we feel gratitude. We affirm that, all things taken together, life is good and has elements that make life worth living. He explains that one significant way in which gratitude differs from all other emotions is that it is never felt toward oneself. The source of your gratitude always rests with others.
Gratitude also plays a crucial role in nurturing our resilience and sustaining our efforts towards long-term goals. As Julie Smith wisely shared, "A gratitude practice can be a powerful tool for longer-term goals that demand persistent effort." Turning our attention towards gratitude generates internal rewards that replenish and restore our capacity to persevere. Emmons suggests that the ways we describe events in our lives is a direct window on how we perceive and interpret life. The language we use influences how we think about the world. A simple shift in language, from "I have to..." to "I get to..." reframes our perspective and nurtures a grateful heart.
The essence of gratitude lies not just in fleeting emotions, but in cultivating a disposition of character. To develop a grateful spirit, we must first be aware of the blessings around us. As Butler Bass reminds us, "To live gratefully involves noticing when a kindness is done or a benefit received." Acknowledging and embracing these blessings instills a sense of awe and compels us to share these benefits with others.
Living gratefully involves a comprehensive set of skills that extend beyond mere feelings. It includes returning the gift of thanks to the giver and embracing the sense of awe instilled by acts of kindness. Gratitude invites us to participate in the infinite circle of gift and response, where abundance is shared, and benefits are passed to all.
As we engage in the longer arc of time through gratitude, we become more appreciative of our past, live more fully in the present, and build thanks into the foundation of our futures. Gratitude becomes an ethic that resists injustice, as Butler Bass passionately advocates.
Ultimately, gratitude emerges as the pathway to joy and happiness. As Butler Bass beautifully concluded, "If you think it's happiness that makes you grateful, think again. It's gratefulness that makes you happy. Grateful people are joyful people. The more joyful people there are, the more we'll have a joyful world."
In a world that often races towards the next achievement, let us pause to embrace gratitude as a transformative journey. Let us nurture this human virtue within ourselves, fostering a disposition that enriches our lives, strengthens our resilience, and radiates joy and compassion to all. Gratitude is not a fleeting emotion but a way of living that invites us to savor the abundance of blessings and be a source of kindness and grace to others.
Robert Emmons suggests that if we go through grateful motions, the emotion of gratitude will be triggered. Today, write thank you notes to the people you are grateful for. Anna Quindlen suggests writing to your mother and father, your sisters and brothers, your best friend, the teacher who changed your life, or the nurse who cared for you in the hospital. All of these people would surely like to receive a long email, but might more thoroughly appreciate a thoughtful reflection on what they have meant to you, on paper, by hand.

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