March 4 – Beyond One Role: Embracing the Multifaceted You for Resilience and Connection

“Always stay true to yourself and never let what somebody else says distract you from your goals.” Michelle Obama

In Chrissy King’s The Body Liberation Project, she explores intersectionality. Kimberlé Crenshaw coined this phrase as “the interconnected nature of social categories such as race, class, and gender as they apply to a given individual or group, regarded as creating overlapping and interdependent systems of discrimination or disadvantage.” King states that “intersectionality helps us understand that our identities, how our gender, race, class, sexuality, ability, status, and nationality, among other factors, affect our lived experiences and the way the world engages with us.” For every individual person, this is going to be different.

“Be your true self and experience genuine joy.” Carmen Carrera

Who you are is who you live as. Your choices and actions need to be consistent with your characteristics, interests, gifts, traits, skills, and sensitivities. In Social Justice for the Sensitive Soul, Dorcas Cheng-Tozun explains that staying in a position where you must be “incongruent”, where your feeling is different from the emotions you’re allowed to express, is stressful and will increasingly shift you into chronic stress. If they are not, it can create stress, turmoil, and problems. If you feel like you are an introvert, yet you work in a job where you must interact with people all day long, at some point, you will burn out. If you are gay, but living as a straight male, there will be problems, both inside you and in your relationships.

“You can’t really go wrong as long as you’re true to yourself.” Blake Lively

Everyone has heroes, mentors, and people they want to be like. Trying to imitate others will never turn out the way we hope. Instead, we must be authentic and true to ourselves. We must listen to our hearts to find what our true selves yearn to be and do. If we can acknowledge and accept our gifts and limitations, our strengths, and challenges, then we will be able to contribute meaningfully to the world. Cheng-Tozun says that “Working around people who are supportive and authentic can bring greater joy to your efforts, amplify your courage, and sustain you for the long term.”

“Let yourself be the person you’ve always secretly wanted to be.” Troye Sivan

In The Stress Prescription, Elissa Epel explains disconnection syndrome. “We’re disconnected from ourselves, from how we feel, from our bodies, from each other, and from nature.” To remedy this, we need to connect with ourselves and with all these areas of our lives. When we are disconnected, we tend to focus on just one part of our lives or just one role that we play. Cheng-Tozun says, “We may each have a general sense of what we are wired to do, but it doesn’t have to be defined so narrowly. We can choose and experiment-and feel free to leave behind what does not nurture our minds, bodies, and souls.”

“There’s something liberating about not pretending. Dare to embarrass yourself.” Drew Barrymore

Epel wants us to remind ourselves of all the things we care about and all the roles we play in life. Our identities have many facets and values in the world. Our identities cannot be reduced to just one role. “This ability to see yourself with a multifaceted identity is a huge ingredient in stress resilience. With this self-knowledge, something threatening one part of your life can no longer threaten your whole being so completely.

Activity: Create a "vision board" for your authentic self: Gather images, quotes, and words that represent the person you want to be and the life you want to live. Reflect on your strengths, dreams, and values, and let them guide your vision.

In today's increasingly digital world, it's easy to lose sight of what makes us human. The constant bombardment of screens and social media can distract us from cultivating essential qualities like kindness, empathy, and resilience.

My book, Nurturing Hopeful Resilience, guides parents and caregivers through the challenges of raising children in a technology-driven age. It explores the importance of instilling strong values in children from a young age to help them develop into compassionate, responsible, and fulfilled individuals.

Through a series of practical exercises and insightful reflections, this book delves into fourteen core values: curiosity, awareness, kindness, learning, self-awareness, fairness, playfulness, compassion, service, belonging, trustworthiness, authenticity, community, and responsibility. Understanding and nurturing these values can empower our children to thrive in a complex and ever-changing world.

This book offers a roadmap for raising children who are academically successful, emotionally intelligent, socially adept, and morally grounded. It encourages readers to prioritize human connection, empathy, and compassion over material possessions and fleeting digital distractions. By embracing the power of values, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and generations to come.